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Darth Bobs Psycho GF
This is a true story about Darth BobBobersons first Psycho GF. One day Darth BobBoberson received a text from his old middle school friend with a picture of a girl, honestly, she was pretty hot, she was blonde, and, well hot. After Darth Bob spent 5-10 minutes looking through her Instagram he determined that it was time to "shoot his shot". Darth BobBoberson then proceeded to slide into her dm's with an amazing pickup line that he stole from the tv series How I met your mother. This line was, of course, "Haaaaaave u met Bob?" Now in order to pull this off Darth Bob added both the Psycho and his friend to a chat and had him say the line "Haaaaave u met Bob?" His friend then left the chat. 5 days later Darth BobBoberson had reached the GOLD MINE, he had gone out on a date with her and had received the pictures. Everything was going great. 4 weeks later Darth BobBoberson invited the Psycho (who is now his gf) to hang out with him and his friends, and yes, we had weed. After a few hours of this another friend, who just happened to be of female decent showed up. She said hello to everyone by giving them a hug, you know, the normal shit. Once she gave Darth BobBoberson his hug Bob looked over to the Psycho and realized that she looked a little, mad, but of course, he thought nothing of it. 10 minutes later the friend that was of female decent asked Darth Bob for a cig, which Bob generously gave her. 2 hours later Darth BobBoberson and the psycho were leaving and on their way home the psycho suddenly burst into an uncontrollable flame of anger, she yelled, screamed, and of course hit Darth BobBoberson. Now normal people would decide right there that dating this person was a HORRIBLE IDEA, but not Darth Bob, cause he is a nice guy. 1 week later Darth BobBoberson was sitting in english class, minding his own business when the Psycho called him, now normally Bob would have just ignored the call, BUT, this particular teacher has a rule where if you get a call in class you must answer it and put it on speaker for the whole class. So, of course, Bob picked up and put the call on speaker, the Psycho then began to SCREAM her lungs out at him for no apparent reason for the whole class to hear, of course, Bob was EXTREMELY embarrassed and tried to tell her that she was on speaker, he failed for 5 minutes. When Bob was finally able to explain to her that she was on speakerphone she then began to yell at him more for "not telling her sooner." 2 years later, Bob had broken up with the Psycho 2 years ago and on his graduation day, he received his yearbook. Now there is a section of the yearbook where parents can write something about their child, everyone else's parents wrote a nice heartwarming paragraph about their children, but NOT Darth Bob's NOOOOOO, they decided to write the simple sentence "My son dated a psycho"